This trigger I will not take literally. It should not be an object. Movement should not be an act.
Yet. Expresses exception. There is this fact and that fact and yet...
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One would not think so, however...there is a change.
Change is not an act it is a coming forth, a natural progression which cannot not be. A welling forth.
Yes this response to this trigger is only a rant.
Have you ever felt a profound lack of faith? Like the world behind you might not be. Like each breath must consciously be had or you will cease to breathe? Each step becoming a leap of faith. I have stood in wonder as my lungs continued to pull air. As I continued to exist in this empty and meaningless void.
Have you ever wondered on how the world does not ask for apology? Has it ever made you laugh and feel free? Has it ever crushed you? I have been devastated by the unfulfilled need to be justified by something outside myself, something transcendent. I have been denied this again, again, again, again until the only response is comedy. To laugh. Humor at horror.
No matter how far you run, the rules will be the same. In Cambodia a man wants to be told he is handsome. In Kamchatka a woman wishes the sun would come out. Have you ever been desperately bored with the world, the universe, humanity, all philosophy, poetry and religion?
I have practiced letting my head drop back and my arms and legs go limp. Laying there too bored to exist.
Is this nirvana or is this the depths of depression?
A self less, un attached, letting go of everything. In Buddhism there is the hope that this will lead to oneness.
Depression says "this sucks"
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