I'm melting. So fat at the edges I'm like a grilled cheese oozing out of its bread. Breathless with distaste whenever I see myself by accident. Heart skips a beat when I think about how lost I am, how far I have to go to even be normal. I(more) know that men don't want to even fuck me, and women won't love me so long as I look like their walking, breathing nightmare.
Yet for some reason I hold my chin up higher than ever. I feel better than ever. Isolation feels clean as polished glass.
My skin is perfect. So what. Hair and eyebrows, perfect. So what. My heart is a sinking ship, beating fast and crazy like rats trying to escape a doomed ferry.
But I feel fine. I feel equal to shoving aside whatever gets in my way. I can push over bullies and sociopaths. I don't need anybody, and I grow bigger and bigger to prove my certainty, my bravery. (less)
"Be good," Shiro had said firmly, the motel door clicking closed behind him. He hadn't addressed the directive to either of them in particular, but his words still hung in the air for a few moments before Keith let out a small scoffing noise and shifted his weight, glaring(more) at Lance on the bed.
"Hey, don't look at me," Lance said. "I wasn't the one who let an ancient unrelenting horror loose on a small town because I didn't feel like asking for help."
"Allura's not an unrelenting horror," Keith said, arms folded and shoulders pulled in tight. Lance tilted his head and gave Keith a measured look, then put his hands on his leg and /grinned/ in a way that sent every one of Keith's hackles up.
"I wasn't talking about Allura, but way to throw your girlfriend under the bus there, Keith."
"Yeah, yeah," Lance slid off the center of the bed, his feet hitting the floor. Unfolding like that Keith realized again that Lance was naked, save for the coat he wore over his shoulders like a cloak - despite having being fished out of the ocean with its owner, the jacket didn't even appear damp. "Allura's not your girlfriend, you just let her suck you off."
Keith flushed angrily. "/Feed/," he hissed at Lance. "I let her /feed/ on me."
"And then you fuck her."
Lance shrugged loosely. "I don't give a shit who you stick your dick into as long as it's not my husband. Besides, we got bigger fish to fry at the moment." Lance had his hand on the doorknob before Keith realized what he intended.
"You're naked! Where the hell do you think you're going?"
"I'm not naked," Lance said sagely. "I've got my jacket on. You coming?"