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"I gotta get out of here, Margot," Mom told me as I reached for the last chunk of pineapple resting on the soggy paper plate between us. I swatted a fly away before I raised it to my mouth, my subsequent lip-smacking a welcome ripple in the thick silence(more)
hollow pineapple
vodka, orange liqueur, lime
and an umbrella
"It's good."
"Are you kidding?! It's *delicious*!"
She ate some more and with her mouth full said, "Yes, fine, it is delicious. It's ugly, though."
He shrugged. "So? Delicious things are ugly. Pigs are ugly."
"Mmmm, yes." Another bite. "You know, this would probably go great with pig. We(more)
The whole thing feels like I'm shitting a pineapple out whole, but without the wallet full of cash and high-fives I would have gotten for winning a "EAT A WHOLE PINEAPPLE" bet. Mistakes were made.

The moral here--if real life had morals--is that if you're gonna do something(more)