A moratorium is like an auditorium, only instead of going inside to watch a basketball game, you just sit there and shut your yap about something.
But if one shuts their yap, how might they possibly enjoy a tasty, totally nutritious Top Pot doughnut?
I conducted an(more) unofficial survey today. I call it unofficial because I didn't ask anyone else jack shit. And I came to the conclusion that Top Pot makes such a good doughnut that I outta put a moratorium on eating other food. Of course, that's ridiculous -- I'm not saying Top Pot doughnuts will kill you, but they most likely totally will if you keep on inhaling them, Tubby. Allegedly. Maybe? I am not a nutritionist, you know. There are certain questions I am not qualified to answer, like "Are you my real father?"
"Nonsense, Me Junior. Have a fucking doughnut and tell your mom to stop calling me."
Speaking of doughnuts, who came up with the idea for sprinkles? I bet the first sprinkles had to be explained to people.
"Excuse me, there are colorful specks of something on my doughnut."
How do you explain that? I've been thrashing about trying to figure that out, and I can't. See, I'm hungry. And as much as I keep writing about Top Pot doughnuts, they don't seem to be making with the free stuff yet.
Seriously, just let me know who I have to blow to get a free doughnut or three dozen. If we have to use a doughnut as a cockring, so be it. I don't know how the perverts at Top Pot get off. They probably throw weird orgies. Speaking of which, you may not wanna ask where those sprinkles came from.(less)
JJ is hungry.
I mean c'mon, you gotta admit, look, over there -------------->
How good do those Top Pot doughnuts look?
Seriously, look me in the eye and tell me your stomach isn't complaining, perhaps loudly, that you aren't eating one of those Top Pot doughnut right this ver(more)y minute.
Look, I'm not gonna lie. The odds of me getting my hot little hands on one of those things is slim to none. There's that whole living in NJ thing and I don't think they'll want to send me one doughnut.
But, at least in my mind, you all live just a hop skip and a jump away from Top Pot, at least a day trip wouldn't be out of the question.
Hey, we all need doughnuts?
Who doesn't enjoy a freshly-baked doughnut, Top Pot preferred of course, with a nice thick creamy layer of icing (sprinkles optional, that's a personal decision and I don't judge) whispering your name? Tempting you to sink your teeth just hard enough to tear off a delicious bite, to taste that sweet concoction as it slides down your throat, savoring the taste before the next bite.
Wait. We *are* talking about doughnuts, right?
So I have the perfect solution to JJ's hunger problem/Top Pot Obsession (and who can blame him? look--->)
Top Pot can have JJ try out the doughnuts everyday, like a Taste-Tester type thing. You know, to make sure they remain fresh throughout the day (which duh,like that would be a problem cause yum! I-hear)
Plus he has to taste-test new flavor ideas. And he can get paid in either doughnuts or money or a combination of both.
Check me out! I just created a job! And cured world hunger! Ok JJ's hunger.
Would somebody give JJ a doughnut?(less)
"So, Governor Veronesi, about the nationwide bar on the sale of alcohol..."
"It was hardly my law," the governor sighed. He hadn't voted for the thing. Any support for it he had ever professed was purely a matter of fiction for the sake of getting on better with his conservative,(more) considerably more established colleagues.
His past had an unfortunate tendency toward popping up wherever it didn't belong- there was the organization he had headed prior to his political debut (the West Gallery Street Gang), the son still happy to be caught up in that particular brotherhood, and all the movie-glamorized vices caught up in that sort of life.
"Governor," his official secretary and unofficial press agent pressed on only slightly daunted, "What I mean is, it's not as if you were the only one against the law... If you had been willing to openly speak out against it it's possible you could've become a rallying point for those opposed to Hayward and his vice squad."
This was where Cham Saqai's lack of familiarity with his employer's past life could be something of a disadvantage. "Thing is, Cham, what makes me publicly stone sober and mildly disappointed...Well, behind closed doors it might have different effects."
"It would be a lot easier to work for you, Governor, if you didn't do so much bending and breaking of the law..."
Clearly it would disappoint Cham to know any more. Best for him to think his boss was only engaging in a little personal drinking in secret- not also keeping in touch with that fast-driving, gun-running son out of his seedy past and making a second fortune off circumventing the laws with him.
"I'm sorry to be a burden, Cham, but I'm a man of many vices! You clean my reputation up well."(less)