it all goes so fast
slips through my fingers like water
trickling down and down
full and overflowing into nothing
i can float through the days but the nights,
in the darkest dark of night i sink before i fly
(more) thinking it could all be over in a heartbeat
if i could just let go(less)
Just let it flow like water from a tap.
Gulping can give you a tummy ache.
(more) I have many problems.
Not in order of seriousness -
1. I have no money. That is the least of my problems. I do have a roof over my head and food in my gut.
2. Losing people I love to mankind's enemy, Death. I have a firm grip on the real hope for our dead loved ones. Mourning, although flowing with tears, is brief enough that I never wallow in the loss.
3. A child that has rebelled against everything moral I tried to instill in her while she was under my wing. Although painful to me, I know everyone has a choice. This is her choice - for now.
And 4. Always the little aggravations. Like: No shopping or manicures in my near future. I am learning to trim my own hair and use a Q-tip to get out the last bit of anti-wrinkle cream or lip-stick. Living with constant physical pain sometimes makes me ornery.
I do have problems. Despite them (most I have not mentioned) I love my life.
I rest assured.
The "whys" answered.
My life has become smooth.
Life use to rage like a river for me.
I never thought I could control the treacherous path I was "forced" onto. That was so untrue.
By making being a good person my main focus, nothing that comes my way overwhelms me. I am floating through (sometimes a mess but...) life. Realizing that I can control how I handle what comes, I have no control what comes, I (for the most part) remain chilled.
"Never be anxious about the next day, tomorrow will have it's own anxiety"