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Spur. A word that, when spoken aloud too many times, no longer retains any meaning.

What spurred me on when I was writing frequently? What is different about my life now than a few months ago? I have time. I have oodles of time. No job. No school.(more)
It takes me about 7 minutes to smoke a cigarette. I've always been a slow smoker. It's because I actually enjoy smoking. Real addicts just need the nicotine immediately and don't care about the experience of smoking the cigarette so much. They're going to smoke another one in a(more)
I was 6. She was in the womb. When she brings up that I'm older, I am almost surprised. It doesn't occur to me. I can't perceive the age difference. We didn't know each other growing up. If we had, we probably would not have gotten together. When I(more)
I always feel like people are laughing at me, wondering who I think I am, walking into a bar like that. I'm too short/fat/ugly. What the fuck is she wearing? Is there something on my face? My hair must be static from the dry air, I bet it's having(more)
I would forget, sometimes. Most of the time. He was handsome in that scraggly way, longish brownish curlyish hair that just sort of hung whichever way it wanted to, blue or green eyes, I could never quite tell. One of the nicest guys I've ever met, and not in(more)
The first time I went food shopping alone after we broke up, I had no idea what to do. I stood in the aisles looking at cans and boxes. I didn't know what I liked anymore. Everything I knew was about us. What WE did, what WE wanted, what(more)
I tell her everything. And what I don't tell her, I show her. She is the one who has to put up with hysterical me, lazy me, obsessive me, bored me. Sometimes we do lots of stuff together. Sometimes we do nothing together. We've lived in so many places,(more)
At the end of my senior year in high school, my calculus teacher handed everyone the class list and said to write something nice by each person's name, or nothing at all if you didn't know them or didn't like them. It was all anonymous, and she typed it(more)
the thought of you fucking someone else upsets me. i get angry just thinking about it. maybe throw a few things around the room. look at myself in the mirror. wonder if my boobs are too small, my ass too big. wonder if she is taller. or if you've(more)
I owe about 10 grand. I ended a relationship with someone I am absolutely certain is perfect for me. My car is in the shop for the umpteenth time in the past six months. The last time I saw my mother, we fought every day for a week. At(more)
It sits in clean piles all over my room. Some on the bed, some still hanging on the rack, some even in a laundry basket, if you can imagine that. I cannot function with this mess. I must fold it and put it away in order to feel like(more)
You don't hear the emotion in my voice because I hide it. I have a good poker face. And I have a good poker voice. I know what my tell is. I figured it out one day when I was playing. I haven't told anyone. And I haven't played(more)
i have sabotaged everything in my life. my education, my career, my relationship, my other relationship, my third relationship. why? because i try to do everything at once and be everything to everyone. because i want to be the most important. because i'm immature and selfish and naive. i(more)
The most dangerous four letter word in the English language doesn't have any aggressive, loud letters in it like 'K', that stabs your ear drums when hurled in your direction. It doesn't begin with a condescending, swooping 'SHHHHH' sound that immediately causes you to look up, look around. It(more)
so i wrote this really awesome thing and then deleted it by accident. FUCK. the point was that we're always on the edge of a grave whether or not we get pushed in unexpectedly, fall in lackadaisically, or jump in on our own, because we are done with life.