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carrotcarmen
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“Skinny dipping” was an oxymoron for Dorothy.   She sucked in, removed her diaperesque panties, and joined the others in the safety of a water cover-up.  

She was part of the Adult Girl Scout movement championed by Oprah, herself.  Mothers across America, with desperation of the (more)
When I first met him I was pretty sure he was a pirate.  I was no match for a man who had a harem of mermaids in his wake.  Me, who was a Jane Austin, harkened to his whispers and started to believe my red locks were “the flame of beauty.”  I(more)
"Duel tough, Hon," said the princess in Anagram Land.  He did, so she let him in.
“Your son is very ill.”  The doctor droned facts & medication possibilities.  All I heard was “he is in a great deal of pain.”  Jesus.

If I were a dolphin, I would have been a better mother for him.  I would have held him in the womb for 12 months, using extr(more)
Please do not preach to me about why being gay = going to hell.  I am not interested.  I want to rescue every child from your judgement while trying to maintain a sense of self during your bullying in the name of Christ.  I judge you back, and resent you for pulling(more)
I teach birds of prey.

My school days are spent with young mobsters in and out of detention & mental health hospitals.  I educate them in the dark arts of reading and how to perpetrate algebra, attempting to convince them that these are things much more attractive than breaking(more)
I have 27 skirts and 4 shirts, not counting t shirts or tank tops; just what my mom would call shirts.  The imbalance of my wardrobe is mocking me.  How did this happen?  No wonder getting ready for work necessitates the inventive use of footwear and Mexican jewelry.  I am off kilter(more)